A Pain In The Neck

A Pain In The Neck

I wrote some time ago about having neck, shoulder and elbow problems...

 

I went to the doctor about it almost three months ago at the beginning of November.

 

Things are moving along.

 

Since the doctor’s appointment I have had an x-ray, spoken to the doctor on the phone and had a meeting with a very nice ‘triage’ woman early in December.

 

“Right, let’s have a look at your x-ray.” She said and clicked around on her computer. “Oh, it’s not here. Where did you have it taken?” she asked.

 

Apparently, although only a few miles away, the hospital was in a different district and she didn’t have access to their files.

 

We were both disappointed as it would have been quite useful to her for planning the necessary treatment.

 

Fortunately she was able to use creative imagination and a plastic skeleton to demonstrate the possible problem and propose the way forward; physiotherapy and a consultation with the orthopaedic team.

 

She told me that one would phone me and one would write to me. I can’t remember which was which.

 

So, while I am eagerly awaiting further contact, life goes on with manageable discomfort.

 

Yesterday I went to the hairdressers and was directed as usual to the dreaded backwash:

“Could you put YOUR head back for me please?”

I carefully put my head back.

She washed my hair vigorously and by the time she asked if I was “having conditioner today” my neck had had enough and I declined.

“Could you put YOUR head forward for me?”

With no small effort I put my head forward. She rubbed the back of my hair and I heard that ‘still soapy’ sound.

“Could you put YOUR head back again for me?”

I obliged and she did the necessary further rinsing.

“Could you put YOUR head forward for me?”

I creakily put it forward and she placed a towel on the edge of the sink.

“Could you put YOUR head back for me?”

I gritted my teeth; put my head back again and she rubbed it manically with a towel.

“Can you put YOUR head forward again for me.”

I was getting rather agitated by this torture but managed to heave my head forward to the upright position.

She placed another towel on the edge of the sink. I knew what was happening now. This was the finale where she loosely wraps the towel around my head before leading me to sit looking at myself in the mirror. Looking at myself and acknowledging that my head wrapped in a damp towel with a corner hanging over one eye is not my best look. Not my best look but a little better than the woman next to me with silver flaps stuck to her head and sheepishly reading a magazine.

“Could you put YOUR head back again for me?”

“Actually, no, I can’t.” I replied “I’ve got a bad neck. I can’t be putting it backwards and forwards like this all the time.” My words came out surprisingly more harshly than I had expected.

She struggled awkwardly across the backwash to ineffectually wrap the towel around my head.

“Would you come over to THIS chair for me? Would you like a coffee?”

“No thank you.” I replied as I sat down and, with my unobscured eye, regarded my grumpy little face in the mirror and wondered when I would hear from the orthopaedic team.

“The two enemies of human happiness are pain and boredom.” ~Arthur Schopenhauer~