English Folk Song Sweet

English Folk Song Sweet

Exposing the secrets of cellists…

 

Last week, in my post “Stressed Note” I described a music theory question where the task was to compose a rhythm to given words.

 

It is a little known fact that the players in the cello section of our orchestra do the reverse of this; inventing words and phrases to fit a given rhythm.

 

For some reason, these words and phrases always seem to revolve around food and beverages. Pineapple Cake for example is three short notes followed by a longer note.

 

When you see the cello section elegantly and faultlessly executing 30 bars of relentless rhythm; are they emotionally connecting to the composer and describing, through music, the complexities of human existence? The bitter-sweet experience of strolling through the English countryside on the eve of war? The exhilaration, passion and pain of unrequited love? The wild-eyed madness of pirates landing ashore after months on the salty high seas?

 

No.

 

It is much more likely that they are thinking “PINEapple cake a PINEapple cake. PINEapple cake a PINEapple cake. PINEapple cake a PINEapple cake.” Possibly interspersed a few bars of “GIN and Tonic. GIN and Tonic.”

 

This prosaic practice is often frowned upon, especially by us lot in the violin section, which is completely unfair as we at least, more often than not, have the melody to keep us on track. The cello section is the heartbeat of the orchestra and as such must be reliable and steady – if culinary devices help to achieve this then who are we to judge?

 

The orchestra rehearsal on Saturday however revealed that this practice is not without its pitfalls…

 

At an important and dramatic entrance for the cellos, the rhythm fell into complete chaos and the music collapsed like a house of cards.

 

When Maestro asked what had gone wrong, one of the cellists confessed: “Sorry! It was supposed to be ‘have a cup, have a cup of tea’ and I did ‘blackberry ice cream’ by mistake.”

 

Maestro, who is seemingly unaware of the cello section’s dark secret, looked a little baffled and said “Well let’s get this right FIRST and THEN we can all have a tea break.”

 

Nothing is ever as it seems.