Last Fight Of The Proms

Last Fight Of The Proms

I’ve wanted to go to the BBC Proms at the Royal Albert Hall for quite some time but haven’t managed to go as yet. When I heard that there was a “Last Night of the Proms” concert being held locally, it seemed like an opportunity too good to miss…

 

We bought our little flags and went to our seats.

 

The audience appeared to be largely made up of sedate elderly classical music lovers, with the notable exception of an excitable woman wearing a plastic union jack bowler hat, brandishing a St. George’s cross flag and blowing on a party horn. She was seated with her partner in the middle section to our left and a couple of rows down.

 

The lights dimmed, the audience settled down and the concert began. It was a small orchestra and the musicians were brilliant. The audience listened attentively.

 

I knew from watching the Proms on television that there were certain behavioural rules and strange rituals, but I wasn’t completely sure of Prommer etiquette, so looked about me for guidance. It seemed, for the moment, that the general idea was to sit quietly and appreciate the music with flags down until prompted otherwise.

 

The orchestra played Elgar’s Nimrod beautifully. The audience applauded politely. The excitable woman leapt out of her seat, waved her flag wildly, let at a loud “Whoot!” as a prelude to enthusiastic party horn hooting.

 

I couldn’t help but notice that this outburst attracted the attention of other members of the audience too. The lady in front of me tutted and muttered something to her friend. The lady behind the excitable woman said “shhh!” and shook her head at her husband.

 

The next piece was announced. The excitable woman shouted “Yay!!!” and bounced up and down in her seat. The lady in front of me said “Oh! Really!” and locked her eyes onto the back of the excitable woman’s bowler-hatted head. The laser-like glare didn’t deter the excitable woman who continued to bob up and down rhythmically to “Barnacle Bill” the theme tune from Blue Peter. I was actually rather impressed that she managed maintain an exhilaratingly fast bobbing rate even during the presto finale. The lady behind the excitable woman folded her arms.

 

The next piece was announced; a medley from “Oliver!” with a duet accompanied by the orchestra. The excitable woman was moved to join in, screaming “I’d do anything, ANYTHING for yoooooouuuuu!!” into her partner’s face. Her partner looked at the floor. The lady behind the excitable woman rolled her eyes at her husband. The lady in front of me leaned forward slightly and redoubled her glaring efforts.

 

The next piece was quieter and more subdued. The excitable woman calmed down and simply swayed from side to side waving her flag at the head height of the lady behind her. The lady behind her initially tried to synchronise her movements so that she could watch the orchestra but gave up, folded her arms more tightly and stared at the plastic union jack bowler hat.

 

The next piece was announced; “Land of Hope and Glory”. The excitable woman shouted “Yayyyyyy!! Yayyyyy!! Yaaaaaaayyyyy!!!” and gave several blasts on her party horn. The audience was encouraged to wave flags.

 

We all waved our flags.

 

Then I noticed that the lady behind the excitable woman wasn’t waving hers. Instead she was rolling the flag tightly around the stick and closely watching the movements of the excitable woman’s flag.

Then she struck. She viciously lashed out and hit the excitable woman’s flag pole several times before knocking the plastic bowler hat forwards.

 

The excitable woman caught her bowler hat and turned round to the lady behind her. The lady behind quickly unfurled her flag, adopted an indomitable stalwart expression, and proudly waved her union flag with everyone else. The excitable woman looked confused and turned forwards again. The lady behind smiled and winked at her husband who gave her a congratulatory pat on the knee.

 

We all stood for “God Save the Queen” before leaving.

 

So, my first “Last Night of the Proms” was a movingly patriotic and yet humbling experience giving me a deeper appreciation of the distinctly Great British character.